30 weeks

In the midst of my bedrest I have discovered a few things.

1. My church family and friends care for my family and I more than I had previously thought. The outpouring of love for our situation is humbling. Meals are brought to us almost every other evening, cards are sent, the kiddo is taken to and from school, and shopping trips are taken care of. Not having to relay on the Hubbs is such a weight taken off my shoulders. He was busy enough with school, work, and finishing the nursery. With all the help we have been receiving, the kiddo and I can actually spend time with him.

2. A couch should never be considered a bed. I can't go upstairs to sleep in my bed. With all my bathroom activity at night, the stairs prove to be too strenuous for my resting body. I miss sleeping next to my husband. I will never take that for granted again.

3. Daytime television is not interesting. The news repeats itself every 10 minutes, I have enough drama in my life, I don't need soap operas. Talk show personalities think they are either A) saints B) absolutely hilarious or C) both. The Food Network is not a good channel to watch while pregnant and either are all the birthing/baby shows.

4. Evening television isn't all that great either. Numbers (It all started when I started working in the Math Department), The Jay Leno Show (I always thought he was far funnier than Conan!), and Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (Funniest comedian on TV!) are the only shows I watch on a regular basis. Anything else is filler.

5. Reading is a great way to pass the time, but I have discovered that I can only read for maybe 45 minutes before I doze off. It can be any book, no matter how interesting, I get sleepy and end up falling asleep.

6. An outing to church or a Doctor appointment wears me out so much now that I come home and take a very long nap. It is so weird to me. Just 2 weeks ago I was out running around doing errands and normal life activities. Now I feel exhausted going out once a week! This will prove interesting when the boys do arrive!

Lastly, I have discovered the indescribable joy of fully focusing on growing babies in my belly. I'm not busy going place to place running errands or attending meetings. I feel and notice every movement Roo and Lou make. I sit here and watch them move around my belly. I sing to them. I talk to them. I feel like we are bonding even before they are born.

I am reminded with every kick they make that God has done a miracle in me. Four years of praying, begging God for another baby. Finally getting to the point that I began to ask Him, "Lord, if it isn't your will for us to have another baby, please take the desire from my heart." He never did, instead He blessed me with patience, growth in His spirit, and the ability to praise Him when I felt lost. Then He decided to give me a double blessing with Roo and Lou.

I am so thankful. Even with bedrest and hospital bills, I could never describe how thankful I am for my boys.

Bedrest

Bedrest isn't as terrible as I thought it would be.... yet! I am on day 4 and although I get bored a lot and my rear end is numb, my friends/husband/child/church family are taking great care of me! The Hubbs hasn't had to cook dinner yet this week and some of my friends are coming to visit me, which makes this whole ordeal much easier.

Once a day, I have to lay on my left side and count how many times Roo and Lou move and/or kick. The numbers have been quite high, which is great. Always in the 40's or 50's. I think when I lay on my side they believe party time has begun and get their groove on. It makes me laugh, I am using this time I have with my boys as my opportunity to enjoy the end of this pregnancy. I highly doubt we will have more children (even though I would love to!) and I don't want to take this time of my life for granted. I only am able to grow human being(s) inside my body for a total of 19-20 months out of my life, I want to cherish this time. Maybe this is why I'm on bedrest, God wanted me to enjoy the last of this pregnancy and I am going to.

I love their kicks and different movements. Even today while I was counting kicks and it felt like Lou would push on my bladder like he was playing with me saying "Is that your bladder Mom?" "Does this make you have to pee?" "Mom, if I push can you feel it?" I wonder if they are already getting personalities in utero. If so, these boys are going to be hilariously fun to be around. :o)

trying to make an early appearance

What a ride these last few days have been!

On Wednesday, I had a routine ultrasound with the boys and during the U/S the doctor asked me if I felt something. I wasn't and it turns out that I was having a contraction. After some initial freak out and discussion, the doctor sent me up to the hospital. Not my local hospital, but the big city hospital 90 minutes away.

I have been here ever since with contractions coming every once in awhile, contractions that I still can not feel at all. The only indication that we have of me having a contraction is the sudden urge to urinate, which is weird since I'm 29 weeks pregnant, of course I have sudden urges to pee! Roo and Lou are being monitored at least once a shift and the Hubbs will be staying the night tonight, which I am happy about. He has been driving up here every day and then going back home to take care of the kiddo, who I am missing so much. I have never been away from her for so long and my arms are aching for her.

Thankfully I have an awesome support system at home of people who are taking care of her and loving her. She is staying with one of my BF's tonight whose daughter is her BF, so she will have fun. The town I am in has a Krispy Kreme doughnut shop and I am dying to go there. Told the kiddo that I will be stopping on my way home and will bring her something yummy, so we are both looking forward to my leaving the hospital - not just that we will be together again, but that we will get yummy doughnuts!

It sounds like we will be heading home tomorrow and hopefully that will happen. I really want to see my OB. He is the absolute best and I really want his input on this.

In all of this, I am praising God for keeping me and the boys safe. I know I have a large group of people praying for me and I am so thankful for that. I know God has the perfect plan and I am trusting Him completely in this situation. The doctors can say and do whatever they want, but He is the one in charge and really, there is nothing as comforting as that.

A perfect girl for me

On the eve of my daughters birthday I am remembering everything about the day of her birth and reminiscing all the wonderful memories we already have together and also getting a little teary eyed that she is already 7 years old! It is hard for me to remember a time without her in my life.

She is the perfect girl for me. She is the princess I always wanted who loves to sing and dance. She loves Barbie and Disney Princesses. She loves to cook and bake with me and put on lip gloss. She is most happy wearing a skirt or dress and even more happy when heels are a part of the outfit. A perfect evening includes a bubble bath and snuggling with Mom.

She is a ham in front of the camera and enjoys her time on stage, yet gets bashful when all eyes are on her. I get to enjoy performances of songs and/or dances she creates all by herself and listen to jokes she learned from her Dad or Grandpa.

She also has a tomboy side to her. She loves to play in the dirt and go fishing. Her favorite times with Daddy are wrestling and rough housing with him. She climbs all over our dog and helps Daddy out with projects around the house.

She is so smart! She is so curious about things and wants to be a scientist. She received a microscope for Christmas and loves to use it. She plays basketball and swims, yet can't stand soccer. On the rare occasion Daddy takes her on a run she will run her little heart out, but love every minute of it.

My kiddo has a heart of gold and loves on people all the time. She considers our family friends to be more like family than just friends. You know my daughter loves you if you get hugs from her every time you see her. She has compassion for others like no one I have ever seen. She hurts when others hurt and will do what she can to make you feel better, even if all it is, is a kiss on the cheek and an "I love you."

More than anything, she loves God. She is so thankful for what Jesus did for her and loves to go to church. Her bibles are some of her most important possessions and her favorite story in the bible is when Jesus takes the demons out of a man and sends them to the pigs, who then run into the water and drown. She adores our pastor and his wife and also the Childrens' director and Sunday School teacher. TobyMac is her favorite musician, but she also likes to rock out with Mom.

She is the perfect daughter for me. God blessed me with a loving, sweet girl and I am so thankful to Him. She was made for me and I for her. Happy Birthday Kiddo - I love you!!!

Winter showers...

... brings lots of clothes for babies in the Spring!

Today two of my best friends threw a baby shower for me and it was wonderful. I received many adorable, tiny clothes, handmade blankets, and 2 pairs of extremely sweet handmade booties.

Today was such a blessed event. I was able to spend some time with a great friend who lives about an hour away last night and this morning (our annual sleepover ritual, that I LOVE!) She began a business with a well known company and we had facials last night and a makeup session this morning.

I don't think I could have had a better weekend! Tomorrow is church, naps, and fun times with the family. 10 more weeks until my boys are here!

What a year this has been!

This has been a fabulous year - Praise God!

This time of year brings about a question asked by many people, what was the highlight of your year? It's pretty obvious the highlight of my year - discovering that I was finally pregnant, then, even better - twins! I know I have said it numerous times, but it had been almost 4 years of trying to have another baby. We were thisclose to giving up, thinking God had a different plan for us. I was only going to take clomid for 6 months, if I didn't get pregnant, we would just accept things the way they were and that was that. In my fifth month of taking clomid, we discovered I was finally pregnant!

Words can't even describe how excited and happy I am. My shower is next weekend and I am looking forward to celebrating these babies! I have had a tough pregnancy so far, but I would rather be completely miserable while pregnant than not pregnant at all. My boys are already such blessings and miracles.

This year has brought quite a few other highlights and wonderful things. The kiddo has been amazing, we have done some fun things and enjoyed good times with friends and family. I am excited for 2010, especially March - when we get to meet our boys!

a Merry little Christmas

This year, Christmas at my home was small, yet had some very sweet moments.

To my surprise, my BF gave birth (a few weeks early) to a beautiful baby girl on Christmas Eve. She is tiny, but doing so well - Praise the Lord! I can't wait to see and hold her. We have been praying for this baby almost as long as my own babies. I am so incredibly happy for her and her family!

Before I knew little E had come into the world, we had dinner and gifts at my Dad's. My stepmom made exactly what I was craving - her awesome baked beans and ham. I was so happy! The kiddo got exactly what she wanted - a pillow pet. She was quite excited when she saw it! My Stepmom also got Roo & Lou a gift, which really touched the hubbs.

We came home and got the kiddo ready for bed. Putting out cookies and carrots for Santa and his reindeer. Reading 'Twas The Night Before Christmas, though forgetting to let her open her Christmas pj's - whoops! I have been sleeping downstairs because my back has still been bothering me. I couldn't fall asleep and around 2:30 I just started to finally fall asleep when I heard the pitter patter of little feet. The Kiddo had come downstairs and was checking to see if Santa had come. First she looked in the mug to see if he drank his milk and ate his cookies. Then she looked at the tree and her stocking. I startled her when I asked what she was doing.

"Santa's been here Mama!"

Yes, he has come, but it is the middle of the night. Go back to bed. She wasn't sleepy and kept talking to me. I told her to lay down on the couch and to just keep it down, once the sun comes up we will open presents. Well, she kept talking and talking. I finally started to fall asleep again around 4AM when, once again, I heard little footsteps and, this time, big footsteps as well.

She had gone upstairs, woke up her Daddy and told him I told her that he needed to wake up. That shyster!!! I was too amused to be mad, besides, it was Christmas. So we opened presents at 4:30 in the morning and she played and played till 5PM (right before dinner). The Hubbs and I each took naps to make it through the day.

We headed across the street to our neighbors for a great dinner and enjoyed our evening with them. The kiddo slept most of the time there, but finally woke up for a little dinner and then asked if we could go home because she was sleepy. We headed home and guess what - she woke up!

We ended up watching Pirates of the Caribbean all cuddled and then went to sleep. I ended up getting the best sleep I had in weeks and was very grateful for that. It was a very quiet Christmas and much different than any we have had in the past. I am looking forward to next year when the boys will be here to enjoy it with us, but it was a very loving day as the last Christmas as a family of 3.

Praise God - He knows exactly what is good for us and blesses us abundantly, even when we don't deserve it.